Why a girl needs her friends

April 19, 2012 § 10 Comments

Moving on from the ‘BFF’ chubby cheeky gooey sweet idea… there is and always has been more to girl friends than that.

Before I got married and came here, I had lived in the same city for 24 years. And 24 years in one city entails a few things. You know your way around town, you meet familiar people when you go out, you know the city’s way of life….    AND you have really old friends.

I ve had friends since I was a kid. I mean real ones. Not the ones that you make just along the way to have company. I used to have so many friends and held them so special and close to my heart… one day as a kid my father warned me it was gonna screw my perspective and I was gonna lose focus. But I ‘m glad to say he was wrong. I m proud of the fact that I have friends who can do anything for me and for whom I ll do anything. But it is not even just that…

You see, after you are all grown up and done with delusional ideas about life that you had as a teenager (teenage – the time when you were super sensitive and even the slightest littlest off thing got your world crashing down), and then you grow up (grown up – the time now when you know the realities of life and face them and start thinking super practical)… you have essentially been two different people. Life has altered and changed everything around you and it has definitely changed YOU. And friends are the interface between these two people you were. Friends are the interface between these two and many other different people you may become over time. They are the only ones who have seen you evolve. They understand. Without judgement.

Now this is true for everyone. But there’s something about girlfriends. I ve always believed everyone needs a girl-friend. Even guys need a girl-friend! There’s something about old friends that makes you be completely at comfort and gives you a warm fuzzy feeling inside. I remember during busy weeks how I would run to see my friend early saturday  morning. It was my rewind moment. Meeting over coffee at Rupali and chatting away to glory. Over absolutely anything. She was my partner in interesting stuff – plays, books, movies, flowers. It’s not these things though. What makes a friendship special is that you are completely yourself, the other person is not judging you, you have the best conversations, you can let down your guards. And sometimes you don’t even have to talk. You can just sit quietly on a green hilltop or at the side of a lake and enjoy the air and the view and not bother to talk. Old friends are the ones that recognize your chocolate craving. They don’t bother you if you don’t call for days. They know you just want to stay alone. And when you re done you just pick up from there. And sometimes after months, even years, you can simply pick up from where you left. It doesn’t matter,  coz you know deep down you have and will always have that connection.

A deep bond that will never break over any number of years. Anything else might change, but friends are for life.

They ll tell you when you are wrong. But they ll also tell you when you are right. She ll tell you the hideous shirt looks hideous. She ll tell you that you are the prettiest. She ll come with you to do random stuff. Lie on your back on Marine drive. Hunt books. Have impromptu dance sessions. Funny click moments. Argue. Turn up at your door with chocolates to comfort. Laugh till you have tears in your eyes over the silliest things. Go for jogs. Go for long walks. Goes flower gathering with you. Gives you her favorite pencil. Gives you her favorite book. Introduces you to lip color. Scolds you for being laid-back. You need her to share. She makes angry big eyes at you when you don’t try enough to get what you wanted. She’s the one who smiles with you when you tell her you are in love.

And she’s the one who tells you to follow your dreams no matter what happens.


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